My Little Foray To The Vast Unknown

The year was 1995. I just finished my elementary years and is about to enter a high school freshman. Everything is going as planned. Stay low, stay safe, stay unknown. I was not afraid of what bullies or what people has to say. I couldn't care less what they think of me. What I was really afraid of was rejection and failure. I got too much pride going for me that I dare not risk anything at all. But everything changed when I woke up one fateful afternoon...

I could still hear the splash of water... I could still feel the heat of the body trying to fight off the cold June afternoon... I was less than 12 feet away... peeping through a hole in the ceiling of our common restroom... watching a friend lather himself with soap... my hands moving as if it was his touching every inch of his skin...trying to reach that one spot.. that one thing that will bring god knows what to my being...

SNAP!

I stood up. This is not right. I shouldn't do this. What pushed me to do such act? Guilt. I was ashamed. I ran away trying to fight the urge to look one more time. I have to stop.

That evening,  I learned what heaven was like. For the first time, I touched myself. No, not touched. I masturbated. I released that pent up urge for the very first time since I took my first breath of air. And it was such a feeling that I just can't stop. I have to do it... again... and again... and again...

 I started high school and as if everything was forgotten. Too busy trying to prove that I was the best. The competition was steep. I have to fight to survive. The folly of human needs left me as fast as it encumbered me. Religion came. Everything stopped.

6 months. That's how long I lasted. I just had to peek through the hole and satisfy my curiosity as to what "fun" the person inside the bathroom was partaking. This time, I didn't run away. I watched. I groped. I played. I craved. I came. Almost at the same time as the guy I was watching.

And so it continued to happen and I continued to watch. It was like a dance between to distant souls separated by that mere 12 feet of air. Moving together, as one, to the rhythm of the water... as it burst... as it drips.. as it drops.

It may be the effect of the "love bug" that's been affecting people lately that we've seen people posting different stories about love that made me write this but I enjoyed reminiscing the past.