Bored As F--?!

 

I've been in the BPO industry for more than a decade but I still haven't climb the ladder of success. I guess, moving from one company to the next is not a bad precedent. That, and my attendance issues.

 

I know my problem and that problem is myself. I don't think I have the right attitude. Plus, I get bored quickly. As my previous boss would always say, I'm a walking proof that talents are wasted with aimless people. I have the talent, I know how to use them, but for some reason, I choose not to.

 

Oh, I know I'm good. Actually, better than good. Let's say, for modesty sake, that I'm above average. But that doesn't mean I'm not expendable. I've proven that quite often enough to my own detriment.

 

Anyway, what I'm trying to say is that my current job sucks. It's freaking boring. There's no advancement of knowledge and the pay is just enough to cover my bills. I could leave, yes, but after facing so many rejection in these past months, I think I'll lick my wounds for now, and settle into this job. After all, I can blog while waiting for my workload. It's just that it's so boring.

 

So boring, in fact, that I brought my origami papers at work so I can do origami whenever the boredom is almost choking me to death. Most of the time though, I surf the net for stuff. Did you know that one of the biggest/largest bat in the world can be found here, in our country? The species Acerodon jubatus also known as giant golden-crowned flying fox, is endemic to our country but is nearing extinction due to deforestation and hunting.  All of that I found out because I had to much time on my hands.

 

Another thing that I've been doing is scanning the world wide web for one of my long lost blog. I wrote something back in 2007 when I was in the process of withdrawal from the blogging world but forgot what or where I wrote it. It took me a good two days to find them. 'Them' because I actually found two. One that I wrote back in 2007, and the other one, back in 2009.

 

Please note that they are not so safe for work.

 

The Dark Lord Strikes Back

 

The Dark Room Returns

 

Reading them almost gave me cancer. The grammar sucks, not that I'm perfect now, but knowing that I wrote them and that I can't edit them anymore (I don't know the username and password for them) makes me cringe. However, that doesn't mean that I'm not proud of my work. I am. After all, it shows my psyche during those turbulent years of my life.

 

Well, that's it for now. I'm a little beat because of something that happened last night that disappointed me. Tomorrow, when I can feel a little more sunshine on my face, maybe I'll do a retro post for all the Project 360 that I missed and the two Origami Tuesdays that I didn't post. Well, maybe.

 

Cheers!

Conversation Conversion

 

Hi. It's been a while. How are you?

 

Haller! Kebs lang ang peg. Witchikels nasightsung ang fabulosang nyolikula ni fafa Paul pero keribels lang teh.

 

Huh?

 

Ay, bobo ka teh? Di marunong umintindi ng tagalog?

 

Uhm, yeah... OK. So how's your lovelife?

 

Boom! Lovelife agad ang tanong? May poot at pagiimbot? Wit ng itanong ang ganyang mga bagelya wirishima naman may pangyayari! Kakaimbei ka teh.

 

Alright, no lovelife, how about sex life?

 

Wit lang may ganap waley na lablayf? Assuming lang? Nagmamaasim?

 

No, no. I mean, I was just asking...

 

No, no mo puke mong green! hauff to. Oo nga, akez na ang katuyot tuyotan to the highest bitak bitak level kasi walang dilig pero pero pero, I hab a lablayf haller!!!

 

So, you have someone but you don't engage in coitus with him?

 

Aray ko, nosebleed ka teh. anong koytus koytus pinagsasabi mo? baka gusto mong koytusan kita dyan.

 

Coitus is sex

 

Weh di spluk mo ganun. Sex. Sex. Kangkangan. Iyutan. Diligan. Sex. Sex. Sey eyt. Sex.

 

Sex.

 

Ayan. Ganern. Pero waley sex teh. At bago mo pa itanong kung may love making kami ni labidabs, waley din. Kaya lagi akong imbernadette sebrano. Namputchang lablayf to, walang perks!

 

Ah so you call him that? Labidabs?

 

Yesterday! May tama ka!

 

Alright, moving on. What are you doing here?

 

Ayan tayo eh, may poot na naman. Kulang ka sa sex teh. Divekels pweds na anditech akiz kasi miss kita?

 

No.

 

Tarush! Plang! Pak! Ikaw na ang kabanal banalan. Anywei, gokungwei, nanditey akiz kasi may I announce ang lolo mo ng pagbubukas ng parlor kez. Yiz! Dizizit pancit! Ang pangarap na parlor kez, nanditey na! Ohdavah! Ang tarush lang?!

 

You have a parlor?

 

Ay, teh, pogi ka nga bobo ka naman, bingi pa. Kakaspluk ko lang teh. may parlor akeiz. Linis linis din ng tutule pag may time.

 

What made you decide to open a parlor?

 

Ganitey yan teh, makinig kasi wit ko na itey uulitin. I remember yesterday, the world was still young, uso pa nun ang Cerelac at United American Tiki Tiki. Panahon itey ng pagdadalaga ng mga boyband, at ang internet ay prepaid pa na 56kbps ang bilis. Ganitembang ang panahon, makulimlim, kumikidlat. Ng biglang kumulog, umulan, at nagbukas ang parlor ni Wanda, ang aking propesora sa kagandahan. Kakalungkot kasi wit na bukas ang parlor ni kuya. Kaya naisip kez na bakit sya lang? bakit hindi din akiz? Keri ko ba magspread ng kagandahan? Feelingera akiz kaya yiz ang sagot ko dyan. Kaya, heto akiz, standing in front of a boy, asking him to... to... huy! Bumalik ka dito! Di pa ko tapos magkwento!

Office Affair

"So there's this guy..."

I hate stories that begins with this phrase. It's so foreboding that you always seem to know what the story will be about. But then again, one of the most thrilling and orgasmic stories I've ever read did start with this exact phrase.

So, there's this guy. He's name is Kelvin. He's a chubby but cute guy here in the office. If you're not looking for him, you'll probably just pass him by. But not for me. He caught my eyes.

Don't get me wrong. I will not cheat on my boyfriend. I love him. But Kelvin, well, let's just say he's been appearing in my daily routine to help me get some needed sleep. And it was some of the most, uhm, thrilling(?) fantasies I've had. The way I imagine it... the way we move... the look on his face... ahm yeah, I'm getting carried away. Let's just say that I've ran out of lotion in less than a month of meeting him.

OK, some more description. He's early to mid 20's, stands 5'9, fair to light complexion, average built leaning towards heavy due to some "baby fats". He smells like honey and knows how to dress. He has a great smile that shows off his pearly whites, and those eyes, they look at you as if to say that you are his and you should be happy about it. Besides these physical traits, he bakes, reads, sings, dance, and comes from money. Basically he's almost perfect. Almost. I say almost because, well, he's straight.

There's something about this guy that pulls me towards him. May it be in person while at work or while I'm busy with myself thinking of him. I don't want to be with him as in boyfriend/boyfriend thing. Nope, this is just pure physical, carnal lust. I feel that after I taste the forbidden fruit that he's hiding in that bulge of his, I will be over him faster than I cum when I'm thinking of riding him while he stare at me with those lustful eyes, smiling sheepishly as if to say that I'm enjoying pleasuring myself with his machismo.

Ugh. I need a cold shower. And another bottle of lotion.

My Little Foray To The Vast Unknown

The year was 1995. I just finished my elementary years and is about to enter a high school freshman. Everything is going as planned. Stay low, stay safe, stay unknown. I was not afraid of what bullies or what people has to say. I couldn't care less what they think of me. What I was really afraid of was rejection and failure. I got too much pride going for me that I dare not risk anything at all. But everything changed when I woke up one fateful afternoon...

I could still hear the splash of water... I could still feel the heat of the body trying to fight off the cold June afternoon... I was less than 12 feet away... peeping through a hole in the ceiling of our common restroom... watching a friend lather himself with soap... my hands moving as if it was his touching every inch of his skin...trying to reach that one spot.. that one thing that will bring god knows what to my being...

SNAP!

I stood up. This is not right. I shouldn't do this. What pushed me to do such act? Guilt. I was ashamed. I ran away trying to fight the urge to look one more time. I have to stop.

That evening,  I learned what heaven was like. For the first time, I touched myself. No, not touched. I masturbated. I released that pent up urge for the very first time since I took my first breath of air. And it was such a feeling that I just can't stop. I have to do it... again... and again... and again...

 I started high school and as if everything was forgotten. Too busy trying to prove that I was the best. The competition was steep. I have to fight to survive. The folly of human needs left me as fast as it encumbered me. Religion came. Everything stopped.

6 months. That's how long I lasted. I just had to peek through the hole and satisfy my curiosity as to what "fun" the person inside the bathroom was partaking. This time, I didn't run away. I watched. I groped. I played. I craved. I came. Almost at the same time as the guy I was watching.

And so it continued to happen and I continued to watch. It was like a dance between to distant souls separated by that mere 12 feet of air. Moving together, as one, to the rhythm of the water... as it burst... as it drips.. as it drops.

It may be the effect of the "love bug" that's been affecting people lately that we've seen people posting different stories about love that made me write this but I enjoyed reminiscing the past.