In The Name Of Love

When it comes to love, we do crazy things. I've done my share and asked the same from a lot of people. Today was no different. I did something that I never thought I could do. Have a full leg wax.

Im pretty attached to my hairy legs. I personally find them sexy. Same goes for those of my boyfriend. Imagine my shock when he said he wanted to get them waxed off. Like every good boyfriend, I did my best to dissuade him but to no avail. That is why we  both ended here, at the Lay Bare waxing salon, shouting in pain while trying to laugh it off.

Lesson learned: if you love someone, we do things from as big as saying sorry even when it's not our fault up to the small things like being bottom even when you're a top. Just don't forget that there are certain quarters and beliefs that we can't compromise. Because if we do, we are no longer lovers. Just a robot trying to do his master's bidding. Nobody wants to end like that

Office Affair

"So there's this guy..."

I hate stories that begins with this phrase. It's so foreboding that you always seem to know what the story will be about. But then again, one of the most thrilling and orgasmic stories I've ever read did start with this exact phrase.

So, there's this guy. He's name is Kelvin. He's a chubby but cute guy here in the office. If you're not looking for him, you'll probably just pass him by. But not for me. He caught my eyes.

Don't get me wrong. I will not cheat on my boyfriend. I love him. But Kelvin, well, let's just say he's been appearing in my daily routine to help me get some needed sleep. And it was some of the most, uhm, thrilling(?) fantasies I've had. The way I imagine it... the way we move... the look on his face... ahm yeah, I'm getting carried away. Let's just say that I've ran out of lotion in less than a month of meeting him.

OK, some more description. He's early to mid 20's, stands 5'9, fair to light complexion, average built leaning towards heavy due to some "baby fats". He smells like honey and knows how to dress. He has a great smile that shows off his pearly whites, and those eyes, they look at you as if to say that you are his and you should be happy about it. Besides these physical traits, he bakes, reads, sings, dance, and comes from money. Basically he's almost perfect. Almost. I say almost because, well, he's straight.

There's something about this guy that pulls me towards him. May it be in person while at work or while I'm busy with myself thinking of him. I don't want to be with him as in boyfriend/boyfriend thing. Nope, this is just pure physical, carnal lust. I feel that after I taste the forbidden fruit that he's hiding in that bulge of his, I will be over him faster than I cum when I'm thinking of riding him while he stare at me with those lustful eyes, smiling sheepishly as if to say that I'm enjoying pleasuring myself with his machismo.

Ugh. I need a cold shower. And another bottle of lotion.

What's Your Number?

I saw a movie with the same title before. If you've seen the movie, I applaud you. It was actually nice and surprisingly fun. I say this because the only reason I even watched was to see the ultimate "crush ng bayan" Chris Evans in all his naked glory. If you haven't seen it, do try. Even if just to see our crush play basketball in just his undies.

Don't forget to breathe.

anyway, the movie was all about redemption which is cool. But for me, it was something different. It made me look back and check what I have done in my life, my sexual life that is, that now spells what's in my future.

As I mentioned in my previous post, I've been the cause of many a heartache in my younger years. As such, I began to wonder what is indeed my number when it comes to the number of people I had sexual relations with. The movie states that in our lives, we will have at most, twenty (20) sexual partners before we will know who is our "the one". I personally don't believe in the idea of having just one "the one" because we will love, will get hurt, and we will love again. But I digress, that's for a different topic.

Here's my question though, if my so called number is more than 20, what does that make me? A slut? Maybe. 

Want to know what's my number? I'm currently still counting but I'm at number 68 now. Who knows who else I would add to my list. Maybe, one day, it'll be yours.

Random Post #26

I was reading through the past 25 posts that this blog already had and was surprised, and at times amazed, of how some of the things here were written. It's so foreign and strange that I knew for a fact that I was the one wrote them but they way it was written, whoah, just something I never thought I could do. It was just, uhm, good?...  nah, better is the right term. Better than I expected it will turn out to be.

As I browse through the different entries that I had, obviously, the post about my first foray to the vast unknown has the most hit. And comparing the way it was written to the other posts in this blog, I have to say that it's easily my favorite. I guess I do have a certain gift when it comes to writing "those" kind of stories.

Pride dictates that I should succumb to the urge of readership and start writing more stories that deals with mature theme. Vanity says I should push forward with concentrating in topics that involves relationships and movies. Fear wants me to stop writing altogether. And the kid inside me just wants to play around with whatever.

I'm confused. I'm tired. I want this blog to have a direction. A centralized theme for something and not just a scatter thought of nothing.

Maybe I should just start writing. Let the words and posts take their own shape and let the blog come to life on it's own. Maybe I should just stop writing and be a sloth like I have always been.

I'm really confused. And I'm really bored.

I'm open to suggestions.

Pabling

I usually write in English. It's the written language that I am more comfortable in expressing myself but for the purpose of this entry, I will write in the vernacular to impress the needed emotion and the gravity of the message.

Marami na akong nakarelasyon. Bata pa lang ako, marami na akong napaiyak na tao. Nagsimula lahat sa una kong "gelpren" nung elementary ako. Highschool sya, grade six ako. Sya ang first kiss ko. Kabata-bata ko nung lumandi ako. Pero ano nga bang alam natin noon di ba? Basta ang alam ko, masaya ako kasi meron ako na wala ang mga kaklase ko. Tumagal ang relasyon namin ng mga tatlong lingo. Ang tagal na nun para sa isang bata kaya halos isang buong araw akong hindi nakakain. Tandang tanda ko pa yun. Bata pa lang ako drama king na ako.

Simula noon, nagpapalit palit na ako ng gelpren. Maraming babae na umiyak, nagalit, at nasaktan. Sino ba naman kasi ang matutuwa kapag nalaman mo na ang boyfriend mo pa lang tutoy pa ay pinagsabaysabay kayong tatlo na magbabarkada. Pogi ko din noh? 

 Highschool ako noon ng magsimula akong makipaglaspagan sa mga babae. Isa sa umaga, isa sa tangali, isa sa gabi. Hayok na hayok lang ako sa laman. Ang sarap kasi. Kakaiba ang feeling. At syempre, dahil panahon pa ni mahoma at kopong kopong, walang kapo-kapote ito. Bira ng bira, tira ng tira, sarap na sarap. Kapal ng mukha, lakas ng loob. Boom!

Tumigil ang lahat nung tumungtong ako ng kolehiyo. Paano ba naman, delay ng dalawang lingo si gelpren! Katakot ampupu. Ang alam ko ako ang hari ng sablay eh bakit ganun bakit parang nasapol ngayon? Hindi ko alam gagawin ko nun kasi hindi pa ko handa maging tatay. Sarili ko nga hindi ko maayos magdadala pa ako ng bata sa mundong ibabaw? Anakampusangalangwalangkilay! Ayaw, ayaw, ayaw.

Nadala ako dahil dun. Kaya sa buong taon ko sa kolehiyo, birhen ako ulit. Wala munang babae. Wala munang putahe. Aral muna. Good boy muna ako. Sarap buhay. Galing galing. Dami ko naipon. Walang magastos na gelpren na kailangan regaluhan at dalin sa motmot.

Nakapagtapos naman ako ng wala pang panganay. Pero dahil malaya na ako, naisip ko ng bumalik sa buhay pabling. Pero pero pero dahil nagpaka alive alive ako, kinalawang na ata kukote ko. Isa na akong naglalakad na torpe. Depress-depress-an ako. Araw araw inom. Hangang sa natsambahan ng isang barkada ko. Sarap ng inuman, parehong nalasing, may gumapang, may nagpagapang.

Dahil sa nangyari, nagbago ang pananaw ko sa buhay. Napaisip ako ng matindi at dahil bawal ako nagiisip, may kung anong butete na gumalaw sa utak ko. Bakit nga ba hindi ko pasukin ang mundo na hindi ko pinasok noon? Wala naman mawawala kung susubukan. Marami na akong matutunan, mageenjoy pa ako. Kaya ako'y tumalon, tumakbo, kumadirit, nag split, sabay kindat sa mundong aking ginagalawan ngayon. At dahil totoo ang kasabihang "History Repeats Itself" ako'y bumalik sa buhay pabling. Sa buhay "tres" - isang tao sa umaga, isa sa hapon, at isa sa gabi.

Suma total, naka tatlong gelpren ako pero hindi ko na mabilang kung ilan ang naging pampalipas oras at init lang. Sa kabilang dako ng bahaghari naman, nasa pang apat na ako na boypren. Hindi ko na din mabilang kung ilan ang nakahati ko sa magdamag. Sama mo na din sa umaga, tangahali, at hapon. Nakakapagod pero marami akong natutunan. Marami akong nalaman. Kaya ko na siguro sabihin na alam ko na kung anong dapat at hindi dapat gawin para maging "successful" ang relasyon ko. Yun nga lang, panahon lang ang magpapatunay.

And So It Begins... yet again.

I miss writing. It used to be my outlet for my stress. A way for me to let off steam. However, pride got the better of me. My writing turned to a need for adulation, much like what I experienced in the past. What started as personal writing for relief became another stress induced writing for readers. I just had to stop.

I tried several times to pick up writing again. I really feel that this is something for me. Unfortunately, it seems that writing doesn't feel the same about me. Either that or I lost my writing prowess. I would like to believe in the latter but everything points to the former.

I love reading. It helps me traverse the worlds of minds far beyond my reach. Reading allows me to leave my physical world to join the unicorns and ride the rainbow in the clouds. It just follows that when I joined the blogosphere, I would enjoy reading those entries that are available for perusal. Little did I know that it actually influenced how and what I write which added to the already piling stress that I was feeling.

and so I stopped. I fled. I cower away. I succumbed to the pressure. I jumped.

Much like what I do with my life. Running away from responsibilities has been my ammo all these years. What a waste of space and oxygen.

However, all is not lost. Time may not be on my side but opportunity is. I have been given another chance of redemption. A way to escape the stranglehold of defeat and gloom. I found my white light. My knight in shining armor. My partner in life.

The story continues. Now I wonder what kind of self destructive force would happen that I will end up losing him too...